this stuff has sat in my craw this weekend. and i came to the realization that the use of the computer and tv is not an issue in itself.
it's only when it is used obsessively or compulsively.
well, i've thought about it and talked about it with others, and realize that it's not the issue i am making it out to be.
i seem to have this tendency to make issues out of everything! these tapes play relentlessly! i have a couple beers and it's.... 'OMFG! i'm alcoholic! i should be using this time constructively and here i am just drinking the hours away'. or i spend time on the computer [usually while doing other things that pertain to work] and it's 'i'm addicted to the internet! oh no! i gotta control this situation or it might control me!!!'
meanwhile when i step back, i realize that i have a very good balance between work and leisure activites. it just so happens that surfing the net is just filler. sure, i need to examine the choices and often times need to exercis other options when bored. but even realizing that gives me the power to do so!
my own need for drama and the tendency to keep stoking the fires of the inner voices that continually cause me to judge and berate myself as useless, flawed and headed for 'hell in a handbasket', seem to be stuck to my shoe like gum.
the fact is, i have a very well balanced life, and sure, it would more than likely benefit me to spend less engaging in on-screen activities, but i have to stop judging these things as inherently 'evil'.
after all, technology is a gift! is has given many people a means of employing their natural given talents. it is helping expand our economy [but that does not necessarily follow that we have been good stewards of it]....i'm just saying, i gotta stop demonizing.
and it has to begin with me.
now THAT, i CAN change.
No comments:
Post a Comment